Bridge

Last May, our family enjoyed our stay at Mission Training International in beautiful Colorado. As mentioned in a previous post this time was invaluable for our family. During one of our training sessions we had the opportunity to role play the experience our family would go through as we transition to living somewhere completely different than where we came from and adjust to a culture unlike our own. I found myself volunteering to represent the "mother" of the group.

We proceeded to strap on safety harnesses used for rock climbing. We all had hooks attached to our belts. Our instructors began attaching ropes and cords to each of us. With separate bindings I was attached to the father, son, daughter, and a single team member. Each of the members of our group were also attached with cords to each other individual. It was tangled and messy. Things felt a little close, a little too personal, and honestly, constricting and awkward as we tried to shuffle around together.

We were to represent a missionary team navigating the bridge of transition during the adjustment period of adapting to a new culture and place. We were to walk across this bridge to help our group explore the way we would feel as a team during this time of intense change. Climbing up on solid chairs we began to cross the bridge. The next step was called the "unsettling" stage. We wobbled a little as we crossed this section as all the chairs were set up on small blocks of wood making them unstable and shaky. I began to feel a little stressed and stretched by all my bindings. Those in front were pulling me forward as those behind kept pulling me back. Frankly it was uncomfortable! Looking in front of me with a little excitement and a little apprehension, I wondered how our little role play group would mange the "chaos" part of transition. This had been represented by large exercise balls loosely held together by a bed sheet. I found myself somewhat annoyed at "father" as he fearlessly plunged ahead. My consternation continued to mount as "son" leaped into "chaos" with abandon. Didn't they realize they were affecting me personally with every jolt and move they made on the bridge? Finally, it was my turn, I stepped onto the balls and immediately rolled sideways. I regained my balance, but only to crawl on my hands and knees slowly forward. The ropes binding me to the others were tight and uncomfortable and I couldn't get away. At this point, the instructor yelled "Pause!" We all tried to hold our precarious positions. We discussed how each person was in a different stage yet we could all feel what the others were doing or where the were because of the cords tying us together. "Hey Mom!" Our instructor said, "haven't heard from your family in awhile, when are you going to send an update?" I jokingly replied, "I sure hope I would have communicated to others beforehand that we might be a little tied up trying to cross the bridge!!"

So here is my apology: family, friends, church family, prayer warriors, even casual readers of this blog, we have been on the bridge. I didn't take my own advice and let you know beforehand we might be unavailable for awhile. We have hunkered down as a family and put all our energy and focus into getting "across". And we have kind of been stuck in chaos. Not all of us at once, but we all feel it when the other one is in chaos. And, it kind of stinks. We don't love dwelling in chaos, but we must all go through it to get acclimated to our new culture and living overseas. Now, don't get me wrong, Zambia is an awesome place to live. The people are warm, super friendly and caring. The land is gorgeous. Everything we could possibly need is readily available. It's just that when the people you have walked with and lived life with as well as all the places and things you knew and could predict are stripped away, things are shaky, and a little scary. But the beautiful thing is, He is here in the midst of our chaos. We have never for a moment been out of His care or keeping. At times, I have forgotten this but my family members were here to remind me.

Back to our little role play, our "team" slowly continued to cross through chaos. I found myself constantly looking back to make sure that all the others were making it through chaos okay. I tend to be empathetic so I felt as if I went through it with them each time. This part of the role play especially rings true for me. Every time one of our kids has entered chaos, no matter where I myself am on the bridge, I find myself running to "chaos" to get them across. I find it difficult as a mother to just stand on the other side and shout back to my children to hurry across because it's better on the other side. And it gets a little exhausting running out there over and over. Again, I must be reminded that Christ is in the midst of chaos and He is faithful! Plus chaos does not last forever! As our role play team each left chaos we entered the "resettling" stage. Again, the chairs we were walking on were set up on wood blocks. I personally crawled to these chairs and felt as if I was slowly, desperately climbing to my feet, only to discover that I was still shaky and unsure. A few more chairs and we made it to the "settled" stage. Ah...relief...solid ground! Things felt secure, safe, predictable even! The chairs were no longer moving, we had crossed the bridge successfully!

I have included some pictures from our training session for your entertainment. Also included is a picture of what one of our children wrote while in the midst of chaos. As tears poured from my child's eyes, this was the only way we could communicate. Chaos has brought emotions and reactions to each of us we have never expressed or experiences before. I include this to help you understand and to know how to pray.

So faithful supporters, please know we earnestly covet your prayers. We know you are praying. I know it each time an arrow of His clarifying truth pierces my mind that His church is being faithful in lifting each other up. Thanks for your patience as our family continues to transition. Sorry you haven't heard from us in awhile...we've been crossing the bridge!